Living Like Christ
May 10th, 2006 | by Scott |Bringing a discussion from my comments to the main board:
How would applying the teachings of Jesus manifest themselves in 21st Century America? What do we make of His sayings? How do we apply that? How do we live it?
What does this newfound awareness I have of the person of the Christ mean? How does it manifest itself?
I have added to my prayer to love people more that I will not be afraid of the touch. It goes something like this now: “Lord, help me to love people more and not be afraid to be touched by them.”
How do we live like Jesus?
9 Responses to “Living Like Christ”
By Pat on May 11, 2006 | Reply
I ask myself this question every single day. I struggle with this every single day. Right now, in particular, I have a sister in Christ that I don’t like. She is annoying. She is leechy. If I don’t watch out, she will suck me dry. You know the type? She is incredibly selfish and self-absorbed. But then, so am I. So, I struggle with “What would Jesus do?”. Not the canned question that found itself plastered all over every youth group thing you can think of, but the real question of what would Jesus do with her? I know what I want to do. But I’m not sure that’s what he would do. Part of me really wants to be Jesus to her, but a bigger part of me wants to tell her off. Tell her what I really think about her poor decisions and her incredibly selfish behavior. As if that would somehow help her. It sure would make me feel better, I think. And I’m back to “it’s all about me”.
So, that’s where I am with this question. It really is hard. It sounds all good until you really have to try to do it. Then, you can come up with a lot of reasons why you shouldn’t do it Jesus’ way.
I just want my behavior to match what I say I want to be like and I find that incredibly challenging.
By Scott on May 11, 2006 | Reply
I wish other people would weigh in on this, Pat. You bring up a great question. How would Jesus handle it? Obviously, He had to and He was surrounded by people. He got away for solitude and silence but yet He was surely suffocated in those other times.
I wrestle with this same thing. That’s why I’m expanding my prayer. It seems loving is not enough, there must be a willingness to engage with them as well. And not to be angered when they interfere with my TV time.
By R-Liz (Ruthie) on May 11, 2006 | Reply
Pat– I have the very same struggles. I don’t mind listening to people, but I find myself pulling away from the most needy (or over-bearing) types of people. Especially if I think they’re continuing to actively engage in a destructive lifestyle that they know better than to do.
Just out of curiosity, have you read the book, “Boundaries”? I’m not a big pusher of books, but I read this several years back, and parts of it have stuck with me ever since. There’s a part of me that longs to go through this book with the women in our church. The thing I liked best about it is that it made it okay to say, “No” to situations, to people. Of course one can go overboard with this. However, I think particularly women have a hard time knowing when to say “No more” to something without feeling bad about it. It not only helped me in knowing how to engage with needy folks, but it also gives tools to the needy folks to know how to better handle their struggles so they can continue to heal and make better choices.
God created the Church to be His body here on earth. We all can’t be eyes, we all can’t be legs, we all can’t be hands. Deal with people as God has equipped you, but don’t be afraid to call others in to areas where you aren’t as strong. Along with my husband, I have a dear friend who has become my partner in ministry. She actively loves from her heart, whereas I do so more from my head. We learn from each other, and it’s been good for both of us to have someone tell us if we’re just being selfish by not wanting to engage with a person, or if it really is best to step away.
This is just where I am today. I’m sure I will have a different POV on this question 5 years from now.
By Jason Bybee on May 11, 2006 | Reply
Like Pat, I have a difficult time living out my faith in relationships. I’m somewhat of an introvert, and I’ve always had this aversion to intimacy. But there are a few relationships I have that I’m constantly having to remind myself to maintain a Christ-like attitude. But it’s difficult because I walk a fine line between being Christ-like and being fake. I cringe at inauthenticity. The last thing I’m going to do is fake a smile. But then Jesus convicts me. He calls me to love these individuals, to choose to love them in spite of how they’ve mistreated me or others I love. He brings about this “God-awareness” that won’t allow me to hate them, which is my natural inclination. He calls me to see them as He sees them…as He sees me.
But, man, is it difficult. I want to be cowardly. I want to sever relationship. I want to cut and run.
But He calls me to something more.
By Doug Freeman on May 11, 2006 | Reply
Pat, this may not be very good advice, but i believe there is a solution to deal with this person. Have you ever considered sitting down with her and talk about those things she does that irritates you? I have done this with some in the church and it has brought about a better understanding of each others feelings. I have a feeling that a conversation with the love that we all should have for each other can win over in difficult situations. I have been an elder for 40 years and have talked to those that continually cause problems and in many cases they did not fully realize what they were doing wrong and they changed. Some you may never change but at least they know how you feel and that you still love them. As christians, we need each other and we belong to each other. I am amazed now how much love exist in our congregation because it is stressed continually and shown to each other. You might express to this person how much you are depending on her to help you in your service to the Lord. The old saying of the Lord never promised us a rose garden, but he expects us to know how to deal with the thorns.
Sorry to butt in but i understand your concern. Tell Bruce I said Hi.
By Pat on May 12, 2006 | Reply
Thanks to all of you for commenting on this. Ruthie, I really like your suggestion of a partner in ministry, and upon reflection, I have one. She, like your friend, loves from her heart more from her head (and it’s the reverse for me), so I use her as a sounding board. Our little church has helped this individual so many times out of financial jams. This has been going on for over 2 years. We have told her to seek counseling (at our expense), we have set her up with a financial counselor (which she doesn’t use). We have used so many ways to try to show her how to navigate out of the quagmire her life has become. But, she chooses not to follow our advice.
We (the elders, elders’ wives, and Bruce and I) have finally come to the conclusion that we are not helping her. We are enabling her to continue in her destructive path. So, that’s it for us. We will be there to encourage her, but we are not a mental health clinic or social services. Somewhere along life’s pathway, a person has to gut it out and do the hard work of reconstruction. Not that God will be absent in that, but a person has to put forth a good faith effort to change. We’re just not seeing that in her.
This is very difficult for me because I don’t want to change some parts of myself either. Nobody does really. And yet I expect God to work with me anyway.
Bottom line, I don’t want God to be disappointed in the way we handle this. Thank goodness for other godly folks who help you in times of hard decisions.
Bruce said this morning, “I don’t think if the woman caught in adultery kept continuing in her lifestyle that Jesus would have responded to her in exactly the same way. I don’t think he would have picked up a rock, but I think he might have said something like ‘I’ve told you your choices. I respect your decision.’ and that would have been that.” I think this is where we are at with this individual (a single mom with 3 kids), but it sure is hard.
By Pat on May 12, 2006 | Reply
By the way, I haven’t read Boundaries, but I think I will. But I have a suggestion for a book that has helped me with this and clears my head about it. It is called Friedman’s Fables by Edwin Friedman. He is a Jewish family counselor and the first fable in the book, “The Bridge”, is worth the entire price of the book. It is a fabulous resource for people who deal with difficult people and church situations. Check it out.
By Pat on May 12, 2006 | Reply
Sorry to keep talking, but check out my blog and read “The Bridge”. http://www.pthweatt.blogspot.com
By scott on May 12, 2006 | Reply
Great comments. I would like to see a discussion shoot off of us along the lines of how those of us who are introverted and not given to intimate relationships can prosper and flourish in ministry. That, my friends, is a run-on sentence.