A Group Project…

July 18th, 2007 | by Scott |

Again, this is all in good fun.

So, you helped me out tremendously in padding my resume. Corporations, churches and think tanks are all lobbying for my services. Now what I need is a good testimony.

In reading Chris Hedges book American Fascists I was intrigued by an evangelism workshop that he attended. Before I proceed, let me say that I do not recommend or endorse Hedges’ book. His hatred for conservative Christians is alarming and disappointing. There is not a shred of journalistic integrity or balance in this book. It is a shrill jeremiad against conservative Christians that really offers nothing to the discussion that can serve as any benefit. Even when he has a good criticism to offer of us it is muted by the disdain through which he offers it.

Nevertheless, this workshop proposes the importance of crafting a good “testimony.” The proper order should include:

1. What I was Before
2. How I received eternal life
3. What eternal life has meant to me

I have an interesting testimony I believe. But it could always be more eye-catching. I became a Christian at the age of 10. I’ve had a couple of bouts of wandering but nothing that stands out in the pack.

So, I need your help to craft an interesting testimony. I’ll start with a scenario. You add a paragraph or so as we build toward a riveting conclusion:

I was working in Corporate America when I grew disillusioned with the Rat Race. I began to consider leaving everything to go and climb the highest mountains on each of the 7 continents. But before I could do that…

  1. 4 Responses to “A Group Project…”

  2. By Greg on Jul 19, 2007 | Reply

    I can’t believe nobody’s commented on this.

    “But before I could do that I met John Eldredge, who convinced me to start eating nothing but raw meat and trout I catch with my own hands. We spent a few weeks living off the land in Montana but ranchers got mad at us for rustling their horses so I took off for California where I got a job as a medical marijuana pharmacist. I figured that kind of pharmacist does more actual work that the regular kind, what with the farming and the being on the lam and all. But it wasn’t long before I got hungry for more–not much more, just a snack, like maybe some Cheetos–and I stowed away on a tramp steamer bound for Thailand.

    I don’t really remember the 8 months I apparently spent in Thailand.

    I spent a little time running eco-tourism groups in New Guinea until I got a middle-management level job running guns in West Africa. It was there that I met a young missionary who showed me the error of my ways. I headed straight for the States, knowing that Jesus has his headquarters there now, and I obeyed the Five-Fold Plan of Rotary Christianity. Hallelujah!”

  3. By Greg on Jul 19, 2007 | Reply

    darn, I can’t edit my comment.

    Rotary is supposed to be struck through, for humor.

    Rotary

  4. By Greg on Jul 19, 2007 | Reply

    see, like that

  5. By Scott on Jul 19, 2007 | Reply

    Great.

    But I quickly grew disillusioned as I realized that my new found church required selling a monthly quota of Amway products to fulfill my “discipleship regimen.”
    I slipped away from the compound in the middle of the night not sure where my new found faith would take me.

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