Transition Pains
November 8th, 2007 | by Scott |As I mentioned yesterday our center child, Cassie, is our born skeptic and doubter.
Chloe, our oldest, is our feeler. She is a people person and makes friends immediately. But she also likes her routine and her manner of doing things.
When we moved here two and a half weeks ago she immediately made friends with the new kids at church and bonded with the little girls who live next door to us.
We are very thankful that she has transitioned into a new church and neighborhood so seamlessly.
But her new school? Not so much.
This week has been so horrible for her. She misses her old friends and school back in Waco. And it’s understandable that she would be the one who would have the most difficulty in transitioning. She loved her school and had so many friends there.
And it just breaks my heart to see this. It has been a great transition all the way around except for this area. And it’s a big area.
Her school has been wonderful in acknowledging the transition. Her teacher is very accommodating and aware of what is going on. The school counselor is reaching out to Chloe. They named her student of the week this week and gave her some positive attention. The kids in her class love her and she seems to be popular with them.
But she is hysterical about going. I think that since we had family in town virtually non-stop since we moved until this past Sunday the strong reaction to the new school was delayed.
And it’s been awful. I hate seeing my little girl hurt like this. We can’t move again while our kids are in school.
Parents, how have you dealt with these transitions? Any of you move when you were young and remember having a hard time transitioning? Give me feedback.
8 Responses to “Transition Pains”
By len on Nov 8, 2007 | Reply
It sure does hurt doesn’t it?! I have been pastor in Clarksville for 10 years the first of January. Our children are 15, 12, and 9, so they have never experienced what you are dealing with now. I hold my daughters and cry with them when needed. Haven’t had to do that since last night.
By Shane on Nov 8, 2007 | Reply
We moved a lot, but only once in a school year. I did three schools in fifth grade. It’s tough. I remember that my parents made it worse by obsessing over it though. Don’t let it turn you into helicopter parents. You can’t do this for her (no matter how much you want to). It takes time. And in the long run, it’s helpful. I think I am far quicker at adapting to new environs because of all the times we moved. Chloe rocks and this experience is only going to be one more positive ingredient in mix that will eventually make her rock only more.
By Amy on Nov 8, 2007 | Reply
I am sorry Chloe is having a hard transition with school. It is so hard to have to watch our kids hurt when we are basically powerless to fix the situation.
I’m sure it sounds like a pat answer, but I just stay on my knees and pray for my kids when they are struggling. It helps me to know that God cares so much for them and will see them through.
You and Tracy are great parents, and it sounds like your kids are adjusting amazingly well to all the changes.
By Carlin Brooks on Nov 8, 2007 | Reply
Scott,
I hurt with you and am praying for Chloe and the rest of your family. I still appreciate the positive influence you were on our kids at MH, especially Greg. Our daughter Leigh’s family has twice suffered the same kind of transition pains you and Chloe are going through and we hurt along with her. One result of that is that Teresa and I can feel your pain a little more than might be the case. Best advice I can give is to keep trusting our Awesome Mighty God to work in this with his kind and tender mercy and make it all shine through the added strength to Chloe’s character and your resolve to keep on keeping on.
We love you,
Carlin Brooks
By JTB on Nov 9, 2007 | Reply
I don’t think I attended a school longer than two consecutive years until high school. Mainly at this point I just feel sad that unlike many people I know, I don’t have that one special childhood friend that you’ve known basically all your life. My actual memories of transition to new schools are a bit fuzzy–just general anxiety and resignation mostly. I do remember in 7th grade once breaking down into hysteria one morning and begging Mom not to make me go to school, but I think that was precipitated by a bangs crisis.
Maybe my mom will comment helpfully on this as she watched us all go through it. But in our family I think the harder transitions in this respect were Ally’s and Em’s.
By Kevin Bussey on Nov 9, 2007 | Reply
I wish I had some great advice to give you. I moved around a lot in the ministry as a PK. I didn’t have a problem. My 13 year old son has had a hard time with it. It stinks.
By Jim MacKenzie on Nov 9, 2007 | Reply
We moved the same time to FW as you did to Michigan remember? We took two of our kids out of school in Feb and Cam had some real trouble with 2nd grade.
We learned: be patient; offer love continuously; stay the course; she’ll get used to it; Probably all stuff you are already doing… just keep doing it.
By Jason Bybee on Nov 12, 2007 | Reply
I’m no help here, just a friend who’ll be praying for your daughter.